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moochii-daisies · 28 days ago

Text

2015.04.

- 18+, Minors DNI

Warnings - Content Contains: Cussing, suggestive moments, mentions of sex, TW: pills, drugging (MC describes bits of the night it happened) a fight, drinking, smoking, MC is not doing well but will be okay. Some tears and hurt (attempted comfort). Unhealthy coping mechanisms (a consistent theme). If I missed anything pls lemme know!

Sidenotes: what happened, my only "plan" note for this was "game night". a dark turn of events? quelle surprise! things are gettin real. as always, thank you for reading if you do and i hope you enjoy <3

Find the rest here!

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I want you to imagine a scenario.

Let's say that the person you were seeing (technically) began living with the person you (almost) saw before them. Are you with me so far?

Now - be sure to include the Almost person's person that they are now seeing (confirmed).

Oh - and their five other roommates are there too.

In this totally hypothetical scenario, do you think that things would always go smoothly? That the power of friendship would prevail over any and all odds?

No?

Well congratulations, you're much smarter than I was.

Once the excited, albeit intense, welcoming party was over - the guys focused on moving things from their cars and U-haul trailers into the house. Lacey and I busied ourselves with things we could carry on our own, jumping up at any grunts or cuss words uttered in our general direction. Our cue to come help out.

I was worried at first, about Lacey and I spending too much time together. Her face turned sallow as soon as Yoongi stepped up on the curb and left us, her arms resuming their crossed position over her leather jacketed chest. But the worry didn't last long.

With Jungkook and Yoongi occupied - she seemed to relax around me. Shoulders sagging a bit as if she had been holding them, postured in an attempt to seem taller (she was a few inches shorter than I was). Turning to me with a shy smile, she lifted her eyebrows with an expression that I interpreted as saying, "Just us girls now, huh?" and I returned the smile.

There was no point in making things more awkward than they had to be. If Yoongi - no, never mind. It just wouldn't hurt to make the effort to be friendly, you know? I had no right to be the only one pissed off or weirded out over the situation. We were all in it together anyhow.

This thought seemed to be a shared one as Lacey and I settled into talking quietly together, casual conversation about how ridiculously some of the guys had packed. Joon had of course, labeled everything with a thick black Sharpie. Perfectly packed boxes that weren't too heavy, placed in the U-haul in an orderly fashion. A model packer. Chef's kiss, a 9/10 (One point was deducted only because we found out later that inside of the boxes were a wreck). Hobi was the only other one who would have gotten a score higher than 5. Although he had technically packed everything neatly - the sheer amount of clothing bags knocked him down a couple points. And his incessant fussing over anything getting wrinkled whenever he saw Lacey or I with one of them warranted another point deduction.

But still - even with his nitpicking, at least we knew where to put what.

Everyone else besides Joon and Hobi had packed in, what I could only assume was, a sleep-deprived, over-caffeinated (bordering on coked out) frenzy. Jimin had decided to label his stuff with glitter pens and stickers to indicate their contents - Lacey and I spent 10 minutes staring at a holographic duckling sipping on a pina colada before we finally deduced that it was bathroom supplies.

"A rubber ducky!" Lacey had nearly screamed her realization and snapped me out of my frustrated fantasy of torturing Jimin for the answers to his sticker code.

Tae had exclusively used vintage luggage bags that smelled like mothballs and old perfume which, despite being sturdy, were still sporting their original leather straps from 1901 and not meant for heavy duty packing. Especially not every single book and art supply Tae had in his collection. I walked by him with one in my arms, waddling in a semi-sumo squat and glaring daggers at him while he took a cigarette break. He let me take a drag, murmuring that he'd take dinner in the foyer once I was finished - immediately begging me not to drop his stuff once he saw the look in my eyes.

I felt closer to Lacey than I expected to once we got to Jungkook and Yoongi's belongings. Both of stood in front of their respective piles, snorting out laughter that had us leaning on the back of the U-haul for support.

To our left, was a giant collection of paper bags with barely legible words in red, black, blue and green ink scribbled onto them (Jungkook's pile) and to our right, was a giant collection of black garbage bags that had been tied with various knots at the top to differentiate between them (Yoongi's pile). Some gym and music equipment that couldn't fit into the bags had simply been shoved into places they could fit. Hoodies from both of them tucked in for some semblance of cushioning.

"Good god girl, like, I was literally there with them while we packed and somehow...somehow I missed," Lacey was wiping away tears from laughter and gesturing at the piles in front of us, "All of whatever the hell this is.".

"Okay, okay - lowkey - I have packed the exact same way before..." Choking back my laugh, I had just started to get the words out before Lacey smacked me on the shoulder with a "Shut up!" - dissolving back into a fit of mirth.

"No! I'm serious!! It's so much faster to just shove shit into bags and be done with it!" I was giggling out my defense, trying to reach for a paper bag without ripping it while Lacey began tugging on the plastic of a garbage bag. How gently we had to pull to prevent the bags from ripping only sent us over the edge more, each one making less than a few inches progress at a time.

"What the hell?" A deep voice, one that almost sounded like a jaguar purred and reverberated in the air behind us. It raised the hair on the back of my neck and clicked an anchored chain around my ankles. Shackling me back down to the ground.

Lacey turned abruptly to look at Yoongi with a cheeky wink. "You've got a good friend here defending your honor babe." she teased, gesturing at Yoongi to come get the bag she had been attempting to pull out.

Yoongi kept his eyes low, even though it was dark out, as he moved forward to stand next to me. I had gone into freeze mode, focusing all of my energy into inching the paper bag in front of me closer and trying to make out the words scratched onto its side.

"My honor huh?" Yoongi's response was slow and gruff. It rippled through my ears and into my brain, the small space between our shoulders feeling too close and too far all at once.

I glanced back at Lacey, who had lifted one foot to rest against the hood of her gray car. Her attention seemingly concentrated on lighting her cigarette in a fight against the evening breeze.

"Uh, more like your packing choices. Glad bags? That's name brand man." Nonchalance. I could do this. He wasn't going to see me falter. Jesus Christ the bag in front of me was becoming my Everest.

A snort on my right shot through my body and my neck muscles tightened in an effort to stop myself from turning to look at him.

"Yeah well, you know me - only the highest quality will suffice for my shit. Speaking of -" He cut himself off, and even though I was actively fighting the urge to glimpse at him with every fiber of my being, I could feel him shift to look at what I was doing - which was gripping the edge of the paper bag between my index and middle finger. Trying to pull it closer purely with willpower instead of practicality. Because I could have gotten it easily, if I had lifted myself up into the U-Haul a bit more to get a better grip. However, I couldn't visualize any way of doing this that didn't wind up with my ass in Yoongi's face.

Yoongi seemed to have realized this and out of the corner of my eye, I saw his head move to look toward Lacey, who by the sound of it had won her battle to light her cigarette and was now clacking away on her phone.

Okay, this was good. This was good, right? Lacey was right there behind us, this was a good way to gauge how normal we could be around each other. Just, regular degular friends. Two adults with a normal and manageable amount of chemistry. Definitely not a relationship that gives tangible proof that the red string theory is real. For sure. Neither of us would -

Long, strong fingers wiggled in front of my strained eyes before poking me on the nose. Tearing my gaze away from the blue letters in front of me, the streetlight was shining back out of Yoongi's dark and piercing ones. Stars in his eyes, like there were when I went to see him.

Fuck.

The dejection must've showed on my face, Yoongi's expression turning into concern mixed with something else. Maybe my nervous system had dysregulated the situation out of proportion. He's a kind and caring person, I knew this. Maybe it was just me who felt strapped onto a surgical table that was tied to an extreme roller coaster. Yeah, he was just making the same effort that Lacey and I were making - to not make things more uncomfortable than they needed to be.

Those were thoughts I remember having before they were electrocuted away from our hands coming together in unison. His, palm up and stretching out for me to place mine in.

The "zzt" that came from our skin touching felt thunderous and the pained shock I was experiencing was reflected back at me through his expression. His usual stoic demeanor zapped to reveal the more vulnerable emotions underneath. God, even the callouses on his fingers felt like heaven. Had his skin always been so soft? Or was it just the contrast?

Well, it's not like I could ask him.

I wished I could have asked him.

Instead, our hands dropped in sync the same way that they had risen.

After clearing his throat and reaching up the same hand to rub at the back of his neck, Yoongi twisted his head to look towards Lacey but directed his question at me.

"Seems like...you needed help?" The annoyance in his voice struck a chord and the building heat of the moment we had just shared was doused out with frigid water.

My own feelings of annoyance filled me up to the brim, flooding out into my reply before I could even think to stop it.

"Seems like a pretty girl over there needed help lighting her cigarette." I all but spit the words at him, staring back at the bag in front of me and feeling him bristle at the jab.

There was a moment of silence after that. And it was quiet enough to hear the rest of the group bustling inside, a few disgruntled words like "Fuck no the lamp doesn't -" and "HA! Try putting it somewhere-" ringing out from the open front door.

Lacey hadn't seemed to notice. Thick whiffs of smoke blowing over to where Yoongi and I stood released us from the strangling tension, both of us instinctively reaching into pockets for our own cigarettes.

After we had lit them up, Yoongi opened his mouth while I watched the exhaled plumes twist around in the air. But I never got to hear what he wanted to say. The sound of Jungkook's airy giggle snapped his parted lips closed and he scoffed. Skulking off towards Lacey without looking back, leaving room for an energetic JK as he leapt off the curb to where we were all standing.

If Jungkook had noticed anything going on, he didn't let it show. Leaning down to inhale from the cigarette I was holding and snaking a tattooed arm around my waist.

After a satisfied exhale, he hummed and nuzzled his face into my neck. The cool metal from his lip rings added to the tingling sensation that fizzed a little stronger with each kiss he was pressing against me. They melted all feelings of annoyance towards Yoongi and replaced them with something much sweeter.

I turned my face towards his sculpted chest, an effort to hide the blush that was taking over it.

"Did you figure out my color code baby?" Jungkook grinned the words, nipping at the top of my ear as he did. My mind raced, shuffling noises from Lacey and Yoongi's direction making it impossible to conjure up a single thought beyond "what the fuck". Knowing I needed to answer the question but desperate to buy myself some time, I gave into my impulsivity - something that felt unusually strengthened in JK's presence.

Reaching my free arm around his lower back, I held tight onto his shirt for balance and lifted up onto my toes in order to bite him on the cheek. It squished between my teeth as he broke into a full smile. And I hadn't noticed the tip of my nose being cold until it was pressed against his warmth.

"You couldn't figure it out could you?" Jungkook teased, somehow maneuvering us so that my arms were around his neck and his wrapped around my lower back - hands patting me on the hips once they had assumed their new position.

I didn't care if anyone heard me.

Letting out a small whine, I released the soft bread dough of his cheek to gripe at him. "OooOoOohh I'm Mr. Jungkook and I came up with an asinine color coding system because I'm soooOOOoo smart." My brattiness was rewarded with a kiss on the forehead and my favorite shit-eating grin.

After a brief pause, and a lifted eyebrow I sighed. Trying to rack my brain for some kind of JK logic, landing kind of simply on - "Um, blue...is for bathroom stuff, right?" It wasn't a confident guess, but I peered up at him hopefully. Maybe he'd be happy I tried and would let me believe I was right.

I was met with rounded doe eyes - surprise and pride flashing their way through at my guess. Without looking away, Jungkook reached one arm back to flick the bag I had been struggling to get towards us with frustrating ease. As he turned our bodies to look down at what was packed inside I was more taken aback by its appearance than the actual contents. Thoughts of answering correctly gone in an instant as I tried to make sense of what I was looking at.

"You- you can't - baby what the hell?" I spluttered, untangling myself from Jungkook to peer into the incredulously packed paper bag.

Soaps, toothbrushes, toothpaste, hair care and other bathroom supplies (I guessed right) were all packed in Tetris-style. Each space meticulously filled. Washcloths rolled up into any open space to help prevent anything from moving.

I had packed in bags for sure but never so perfectly. Never like this.

As he continued reaching for bags, I remained dumbfounded until he wiggled his eyebrows and ducked his head to press a quick kiss against my lips. Using one hand to jump into the back of the U-haul, effortlessly. Too sexy for his own good.

Unable to believe what I was seeing, I pulled each bag closer to me so that I could check inside. Every single one was the same as the first and the laughs that Lacey and I had shared earlier started to bubble up within me.

Being close to Jungkook was like having soundproofing against my sensitivity to Yoongi and the sound of Lacey's voice getting closer felt like it was coming from a million miles away.

"What? What? Wait Yoongs - girl, what is it?" Lacey was panting as she came over and I gave a silent prayer of thanks that I had no idea what the two had been doing since JK came outside.

"So, uh, I never packed like this I'll tell you that much." I told her dryly, tilting one of the bags so that she could see the inside of it.

A guffaw came out of her as she doubled over.

"Okay wait, wait - what the fuck?" She wheezed, blinking back tears, "Did you know he had this in him?" and I couldn't stop the smile that crept up at her question.

I shook my head no, grabbing the hand she held out to help her stand upright.

With a little finishing sigh and quick adjustment of her jacket she looked up at me with a strange look. Almost a challenge. Almost pleading.

"Well. Then I guess you two still have a lot to learn about each other." She winked with the words before calling out to Yoongi, "Babe! You've got packing competition over here!" Her words stung more than they should have. A sting that softened with the small grunts of effort Jungkook was making in the U-Haul.

What the fuck did she mean by that though? Did she know things about Jungkook that I didn't? I mean, to be fair, she had been around and known him for much longer than I had but still - what the hell did she mean by that?

The sense of relaxation that had given relief up until that point was gone. And I chewed on the inside of my cheek mindlessly. Reaching to light another cigarette after accidentally biting down too hard. Tobacco and metallic iron. I pressed my tongue against the bitten spot, trying to will the pain out of existence and searching for something to focus on. As Jungkook walked back and forth to take intermittent puffs, I wound up fixated on the way his muscles rippled underneath his baggy white t-shirt. Pausing occasionally to flick away ash, doing so with an aggression that I couldn't figure out how to rid myself of.

The couple's chattering behind me turned into wet smacking sounds. Little "ooh"'s and "mm"'s from Lacey filled my bones with an angry molten lava. Was it really necessary? To do this when I'm right here? When we were right there? The cigarette had burnt down to the filter but I still stamped it out under a combat boot. Twisting my heel back and forth until all that was left was a flattened piece of brown that blended in with the fallen leaves.

Lifting the same foot, I grabbed onto the side of the U-Haul and hefted myself up into the back of it. Flinching slightly at the metal clanging that pinged around its walls. Jungkook had stopped arranging boxes once I entered, a baffled "Baby what-" escaping from his lips before I managed to launch my own against them.

If we had been a more awkward couple - the forcefulness of my kiss would've stopped it just after it started. Luckily, we weren't.

Ok, to be fair, I don't know if we even were officially a couple but - anyways. That's not what mattered.

What mattered is that after my clunky stumbling into his arms and after the slight bumping of our teeth - Jungkook grabbed ahold of me, letting me knock him off balance. His back pressed against a tall stack of boxes gave him firmer footing and he sighed, the edges of it tinted with a small moan.

I think I lost my mind in the moment. My hands diving greedily underneath his shirt to drag my nails down his back and pull him closer. Stepping my feet so close to his body that room between our pelvis's no longer existed.

There was more to learn about Jungkook. Sure. We hadn't really gone into our pasts just yet. But one thing I did know, was that whatever fire I came at him with - he would match.

A firm squeeze on my ass and the rough movement of his hips proved me right. His hard on rubbing against me in a way that felt too good to ever be considered sinful.

Big hands. Warm hands. And curious fingers flirted with the gap of skin showing between my top and my jeans. One made its way to cup my chest, squishing it before toying with the fabric that was getting in the way.

"Baby- Baby hang on, we- mph," Jungkook's attempts to get me to slow down were valiant but ultimately made in vain. The sensation of his lips against mine only made me hungrier. Had I forgotten to eat today? It didn't matter. I would've chosen Jungkook instead of food even if a buffet of my favorites had been there.

Sounds of his ragged breathing, that usually would have sent me on edge, only stoked the need. Unable to remove me without causing harm, he settled for breaking the kisses. Pulling away for a few seconds at a time to look at me with curiosity and the slightest hint of fear.

The third time he did it, I nearly growled. Successfully capturing his bottom lip in a bite, sucking on it just a little before pulling back myself.

"Whyyyy do you keep. Stopping!" It was huffed out darkly, the pounding of his heart beat against the front of my body so strongly I could feel it between my legs.

It was beginning to ache. That he was so close and still so far. I needed him closer. I would have fucked him right in that open U-Haul, in front of Yoongi and Lacey and the whole neighborhood if I could have.

But instead, I clenched my legs together, feeling them brush against the hardness tenting his baggy jeans and made him wince. The look of pain both deepened the ache and softened it. All my muscles turned to steel. Waiting to hear him speak. Cementing my hold around him like if I loosened it at all, I'd never feel him so close again. His own (much more developed) muscles were tightened around me as a form of damage control. Even if I wiggled my ass off, I wouldn't have been able to get out of them.

The two biggest problems, and also two of the parts I appreciated the most about Jungkook - was that he would always choose to trust me and he would almost always give in to what I wanted.

And while I waited for my response, holding onto him like a dog unwilling to give up a bone, Jungkook decided to trust me. Chuckling to himself as he loosened his grip. Hands gently brushing hair behind my ears and away from my face. Holding it in a tender but firm grip before resuming the kisses at a much slower pace. I wasn't going to turn any of it away, pressing my lips back against his as strongly as I could while he held my head in place. Once I had sullenly accepted my fate, I grumbled out between each kiss - "I", "Would never", "Stop you", "You big", "Big", "Stupidly hot", "Jerk.".

A snicker against my lips preluded a sigh.

Lightly dragging the tip of his rounded nose against my own, his arms moved around my shoulders and I was yanked back against his solid upper body. The slight lift in his pectoral muscles acted as neck support and my cheeks were smushed to the point of blurring my vision. Feeling a pout form, I made a disgruntled noise at him. The vibrations tickling the back of my throat and buzzing against my ears.

"Oh baby, baby, baby. What am I gonna do with you, huh?" There was laughter in his voice and a warmth on the back of my head as he pet through my hair.

"Is it fair to let the rest of the guys take care of all the moving?" His tone wasn't condescending, it was genuine.

I "hmph"'d out a no.

"Would it be nice of us? To have so much fun while the others are working so hard?"

"...No. I guess not.".

"Would it be good friend behavior? To fuck each other senseless on probably everyone's belongings?"

The visual memory of Yoongi's pile being next to Jungkook's flashed through my mind. And I gulped down the bratty response I had planned to say.

My rigidity and sudden silence went straight to Jungkook's ego. I almost never acted like a baby, let alone a brat. Not because I didn't want to mind you, but because I didn't like to in front of most people.

Jungkook was different.

And he knew that.

And good lord, did it make him happy when I did.

"Aw baby. Were you so focused on getting me inside you that you forgot what we were doing?" His tone was playful now.

"Can you believe that my babygirl, that's usually so considerate, was SO desperate for dick that she didn't care about getting real down and dirty?" He was thoroughly enjoying this while I made attempts at burying my face, cheeks burning at the truth of his words.

"Who would've known? The sweet girl that calls me a big baby all the time is actually, secretly, an even more perverted and bigger baby than-" His rambling gloating was making me glow red.

Clutching a hand into a fist, his shirt wrinkled with it and I lightly tapped his muscles in a faux punch. Mumbling, "I'm not the baby, you're the baby." with as much ferocity as I could gather.

The frustration that had been building up since that moment with Yoongi had dissipated and left me putty in Jungkook's arms. All fiery passion transformed into something sticky sweet.

Kisses started against the top of my head with an exaggerated "mwah" sound until his lips found my ear, my cheek and then my own again.

It was the sweetest kiss. The curvature of his lips held mine. A content, "ah" escaping from deep within him. But just beneath that sense of contentment, was a mutual fight against a shared craving. The feeling of his opened mouth sparked at the embers he had just put out. Which he realized as soon I had reestablished my boa constrictor-esque hold on him.

Pressing a hand flat and directly over my mouth, Jungkook barked a command with an authoritative tone I'd never heard from him before.

"Baby. No.".

My body went slack. Staring at him for a beat as my glassy eyes worked to find focus.

I don't know if it was due to shock, or if I had become delirious from being around him (and everyone else) again. But once I started laughing this time, I couldn't stop. And Jungkook couldn't either.

We kept laughing until the others came out to see what was going on, Lacey and Yoongi had disappeared to their room which made it easier to stay lighthearted.

When asked what we had been doing, Jungkook opened his mouth - about to blurt out very honestly what had just happened. This time it was my turn to cover his mouth, blabbering about how we had gotten caught up trying to separate whose boxes were whose.

The deadpan stares and wave of lifted eyebrows let me know pretty quickly that nobody was buying it.

"I'd like to request that all...unsavory behavior be kept to our own dedicated rooms." Jimin piped up, tonguing his cheek and trying to look stern.

Jungkook communicated what I was thinking, "Dude, you're too pretty to be the boss. Use those pouters as the good lord intended and pout about it." Jungkook cracked a grin at Jimin's scowl. Scooching us out of the U-Haul to stand with the rest of the guys.

"Well if you're done being lewd, do you wanna come see the house?" Hobi put emphasis on the word "lewd", eyes darting back and forth between Jungkook and I.

Jungkook's hands raised to feign innocence while I sheepishly feigned interest in everyone's choice of shoe.

"Yeah, yeah, yeah. Lessgo." Jungkook was cavalier, a hand grazing mine to interlock fingers and keep me at his side.

If anyone else had something to say, their moment was lost the second Tae threaded his fingers between my own to hold my other hand. Beaming at everyone, he lifted our hands and shook them a bit. "Onwards!" He rallied with a pure-hearted excitement. The others gave in to laughter right away, closing doors behind us as we trudged towards the house.

I don't think I can remember a single time that front door was locked. Oh, besides that one time. But that happened later.

What happened next was me gawking for a solid uninterrupted 3 minutes. Partially due to the house itself and the rest due to the lack of furniture that the guys had actually brought.

Like their previous home, this one was older and a little worn down. Chipped yellow paint on the exterior, a wooden front porch that they had settled the same sunken in couch onto. The same rocking chair and side table from before were also placed to replicate their previous set up, looking like they had been there for years instead of a couple hours. A dark, shingled roof covered the two-story home more sturdily than their old place. There was no stained glass on the front door but the lightbulbs inside had all been changed to warm, low light. Spilling onto the wooden planks as an invitation to its cozy interior. Except, this house was much larger than their last (my city was much cheaper) and the living room that had once been cramped with the gigantic couch, makeshift TV stand, books and art now seemed to go on endlessly. The couch only taking up a quarter of the space that it used to.

Beyond the sea of living room was the kitchen, curving around to the left - the rest of it unseen from where we stood. In the kitchen was a door leading to the basement, where Jungkook, Yoongi and Namjoon's rooms were nestled. Behind our position in the entrance was a staircase that led up to the rest. Boxes littered open areas but still, even then, the amount of space available made me realize that they hadn't brought any other furniture besides what was on their front porch and in their living room and my worried mother mode was flicked on like a light-switch. We moved through the house together while I hovered around each of them with the same energy as a nervous hummingbird. "Do you need this?", "Let me write this down, I'll get you this.", "Oh my GOD you guys didn't bring this?" bumbled out of my mouth as I flitted until Hobi sent Jungkook and I to his room to occupy me.

And that was how they moved in.

30 days later, Jin came bursting through the front door with a rosy pink glittery cowboy hat and matching feather boa. A darker pink looped in cursive letters around the rim of his sunglasses spelling out - "I'm that girl" three times each. Holding a pipe that Sherlock Holmes would have loved, Jin flicked his lighter and sank onto one hip. His neon green, red and blue button down was hanging off of his shoulders, flames around the middle of the shirt hiding a waist much smaller than anyone would expect.

Once he had taken a few comically loud puffs, Jin flipped a wrist up to lower his sunglasses - and gave us all a Big and Cheesy wink. When we didn't immediately react with a round of applause the glasses were whipped off, yells blaring through the echoe-y entryway of the house.

"WOW. I TRAVELED ALL THIS WAY AND THAT IS HOW YOU GREET ME? I WORKED SO HARD TO HAVE A GOOD ATTITUDE FOR YOU EVEN THOUGH IT WAS SO LONG I TRIED TO P -" Jin's full volume grievances were drowned out by an eruption of cheers from everyone.

Full moon lips pressed themselves together and Jin turned to blow the ash from his pipe outside, stepping back in with a pout.

"It doesn't mean as much when you guys do it after I -" Jin's moodiness was cut off by Jimin this time.

"Hey man, are you a little tired? That was a really long drive, you wanna take a nap and we can unpack for you?"

The rest of us shuffled to the side as Jimin corralled Jin up the stairs towards his room.

"See how I'm not making you carry my bags for me? See how kind of a person I am to you?" Jin's suddenly sleepy voice said weakly. Taking plodding steps ahead of Jimin.

Jimin scurried around Jin to stop him from bumping into corners and things, "Uh-huh, you're really brave dude, it's one of the reasons I look up to you." He paused after each step up the stairs, clearly struggling with Jin's half-time pace.

It was my first time experiencing Sleepy Jin. And I remember thinking that I had no idea there was that side to him.

Anyway - the thought that covered that one for a long time was different. It was focused on Jin's arrival being the moment the house fully felt like a home.

While almost everyone got honed in during the start of their new jobs - Jimin, Tae and I were left to help hang things up, put communal things away, etc..., etc..,. It was much easier for us to change work schedules or get time off. I got lucky and switched shifts with a coworker, Jungkook was able to sub for Jimin at the studio and Tae was working from home selling his art prints online - dedicating more of his focus towards his upcoming installation. It mostly went well. Mostly. We found random bookshelves and mattresses for sale around town and helped get things settled, a little less cluttered.

And we also spent hours arguing over how to nail various things to the walls. Jimin was sure we needed a certain tool for it, Tae believed the hanging itself was a creative process and I kept a bottle of Gorilla glue in my pocket to threaten them with whenever their arguments got too out of hand. Everyone felt included in the resulting decision though, - I'll leave it at that.

After about two months had passed, we had all begun to get comfortable with our new routine. I spent 4-5 days a week with them at theirs, sometimes stealing Jungkook away to be alone all over town, sometimes sneaking him into my apartment whenever my mom was working late. My sister had met and loved the guys, putting a subtle bit more effort into her look when she knew Hobi would be around. It was cute, the way that Hobi would puff out his shoulders in her presence, trying to look disinterested until a sound effect would slip past him - turning him cherry red while my sister would break her neutral expression to giggle at him.

Yoongi wasn't around too much. Lacey and I fell into an afternoon coffee and smoke routine whenever Jungkook and Yoongi both were at work. She had gotten a job bartending at a club nearby, only working weekend nights - asking me to go shopping or out for drinks on some of her days off. It was nice until one of us was suddenly hit with the strangeness of the entire dynamic. Jungkook and Yoongi never really interacted, as far as I could tell. The schedule at the dance studio was pretty consistently 2-8 or 5-9. Yoongi on the other hand was working part time at a restaurant as a cook and part time at a convenience store. His 2-12's extended from 2-5's. Sometimes we'd pass by each other on the stairs during the mornings I couldn't sleep. Him heading down to bed, grunting or nodding his hello's as I made my way up. A moment of mutual sleep deprivation, albeit for very different reasons. Sometimes I wanted to offer him coffee or breakfast. To see if he wanted to smoke or talk about how his shift went. But I kept quiet instead. Not wanting to disturb the comforting peace that was still in its infancy of being established.

It was five months in.

Almost half a year after moving when that game night happened.

At the three month mark, Jimin declared to the rest of us that the house had become too tame for a bunch of 20-something's. We were high as all hell on the couch when he did this - a likely reason for the ideas that came spouting back in reply. Ones that we had no right to attempt even when we were stone cold sober. Things like, "We should rent a gigantic trampoline and throw a party with prizes for whoever does the most gnarly flip off the roof". (Jungkook's). Or, "We set up a DJ station right, like buffet style, and whoever plays the best set becomes our honorary party DJ." (Hobi's.)

After much deliberation and a round of bong rips later, we decided on game and party nights for alternating weekends. "Throw a rager, get our money up, recuperate, chill game night. Then repeat." Namjoon said before blowing out a cloud of smoke. We all nodded in agreement, too stoned to counter or throw out any alternatives.

Now, Joon said "chill game night" but they wound up being more like mini-parties.

Usually someone would bring out the bong and place it on the low glass coffee table on Friday morning. Then someone would wind up bringing home drinks "to have with the game" and the 24/7 corner store a block away from their house gave us ample access to "fill up", as Jimin would call it, throughout the night. But we never actually played any games.

This wound up bothering us to the point that we made up a drinking game. One that became our go to event of the evening. So technically, for all intents and purposes - it was a game night.

The rules were simple. Kind of.

Rule 1: If anyone caught you sober - you had to take 3 shots. (Yoongi, who always got home last, hated this rule.)

Rule 2: If a drink was found unfinished then everyone had to pour their own into it until the cup was refilled. Followed by gathering in a circle around the unfinished drink's person and yelling "chug" until they did so. We each had our own assigned cups and a single Sharpie from the move - that somehow never got lost - to initial beer cans. This rule was taken very seriously. (Tae was so notorious for doing this that he became "The Two Rule Champion".)

Rule 3: Time-Up - Basically, it was a play on the concept of a "time-out". If anyone was caught moping or feeling down, they would have two hours to vent or wallow before a mandatory dance party. At least one other person had to be present and it was only over once the mopey person had started to cheer up. (This was a Jimin + Hobi combo rule. Partly as an attempt to help keep things regulated and partly because at least one of them was always down to dance.)

Rule 4: Someone must always be designated as the "game night head counter" and "key bearer". (Ok, this one was because of me. They quickly realized my habit of convincing someone to go somewhere with me once I'd gotten a little too sloshed. This person and I may have passed out on a bus after leaving game night, and it's possible that we woke up a state over with only two dead cell phones and the clothes on our backs.

...And we may have done it again, only to wake up in a small beach town with no service in the middle of a windstorm.

I can't say that the rule wasn't deserved.)

And finally, Rule 5: Absolutely no canoodling allowed outside of each person's designated area (their rooms).

This last rule was agreed upon unanimously. Nobody offered up a sassy remark, witty jab or dry sarcasm. It was collectively understood that everyone cared about each other, and that ruining the overall vibe of the house was no-one's goal.

At least not until that game night.

The temperature had dropped with the sunset and our tradition of fancy attire for these "game nights" was biting me in the ass quite literally. Cold nipped at the skin underneath my dress, a swishy but short little number that was wine red and crushed velvet.

Stomping my feet onto the wooden boards beneath them, the front porch shook a little. A piss poor attempt to warm myself up to be honest - but my heart wasn't really in it.

I was on a mission. Scanning the side table for a neglected (but not empty) pack of smokes. My arms were crossed over my chest, hands rubbing at the exposed upper parts. The cold temporarily subsided as I caught a glimpse of what I was looking for - one lone Marlboro Light. Gross, who the hell smoked these? Nobody in the house did, we collectively shit on Marlboro's (as if what we smoked was any better). Well, beggars can't be choosers, right?

I snatched it up between my fingers with a sense of triumph that quickly faded. Realizing that I still needed to look for a lighter.

This dress did not have pockets.

And Jungkook said - wait, where was Jungkook?

Pausing my hunt for a lighter, I straightened up. Feeling fabric slink down my back and with a fresh awareness of the frigid night air.

I think I was drunk.

Trying to remember where Jungkook had gone and why I wasn't with him sent a ripple of goosebumps up the right side of my body. Where he always stood. Where he should have been. We definitely didn't start the evening this way. We were annoyingly inseparable. So what the hell happened?

I remember Namjoon started the game night early, almost immediately after he had gotten home - he'd had a pretty rough week at work. And that we all ended up dancing with him for a Time-Up until some other people showed up.

One of those people introduced himself as Yoongi's coworker before waving Lacey and Yoongi both over to join us. And then - and then?

A snapshot image of the kitchen found the forefront of muddied thoughts. I could see the back of JK's head, the shoulder of the grey zip up hoodie he had on, and pretty opalescent nails clinging around his bicep.

Oh yeah.

Lacey had just gotten her nails done that color.

That's right.

To make matters worse, I only noticed this after being lost in conversation with Yoongi and his coworker.

I couldn't remember when Jungkook had left my side or if Lacey had been there at all.

God, I really hoped I was drunk.

I sank onto the front porch couch, the tickling on the back of my legs from the wooly covering barely registered.

But it did so just enough. Just so that I could stay sitting on that couch instead of using the flight response to leave my body. I felt strange. Not the usual fucked up strange - more like something was off. Making me not myself. Turning me into a ghost made of marshmallow fluff and weird feelings.

One of my hands had flopped to my side and a lighter was pressed into it. A blurry glimpse of tattooed fingers helped usher out a sigh of relief.

Lifting my head took concentration, and the additional work to get my eyes to meet his sparkling marbles had me feeling out of breath. Sparkling like stars.

Hang on.

Heat on the back of my head brought the world back around me. His hand was big enough to cover it entirely and the sounds coming from inside the house washed into my senses, rushing water from a broken dam.

"NoooOo I saw it! I saw you! You, you - uh, shit ok, no I know what I saw!" Joon was bellowing in a way that let me know he was swaying. Beer cans crinkled before the sound of metal being hit dinged underneath, Yoongi's low and rumbled, "Swish." following after. Other voices jumbled together, music bumping over and underneath them, overlapping and loud - how had I not heard that?

"-by." Wait, there was something.

"Baby." Jungkook's voice was a foghorn. The sound of it rounding out to fill my hearing up completely. Everything else got caught behind a filter and a beam of life came back to me - my head wobbled as it looked towards him, the weight gone from my eyelids in an instant.

He was standing and shaking out each leg, one light gray sleeve rolled up with fingers still tangled into the back of my hair.

"Goddammit, baby did Yoongi give you something?" The tightness in his words kept my eyes open.

Oh that's right. That's why this was all so hazy.

"Correction sweet boy," I warbled, "I just so happened to take something from him actually. If you, you, uh - yeah, most likely." I think that's what happened. A blue pill in the palm of a hand blinked into memory. Yeah, something like that then.

I was pressing my thumb against the lighter and it was taking Herculean effort to get it to light. The hold in my hair was tugged tight enough to set off pinpricks and a slight burn shot down the back my neck.

A tangerine glow was flicked to life for me and I inhaled the cigarette that I had been dangling in front of my lips with a weak wrist. I was immediately hit with the spins and a head rush that made me go limp. I vaguely remember hearing a "woah" as my head dropped its full weight into Jungkook's hand. The cigarette dropped to the floor and there was a shadow that felt like a ray of sun. Heat cast by his body getting closer, bending over my drooping frame to pick up the smoke and keep it for himself. I had enough energy to focus on breathing, grateful for the way he held my head - preventing any strain on my neck.

A thumb rubbing along the base of my skull is all I thought about for the new few moments.

And then - my arms were around Lacey and Jimin, who were each holding a hand and around my waist. All three of us pressed onto one cushion of the couch. Being propped up like that, I could see a bit more of what was happening.

Jungkook was moving very fast and Yoongi was moving with him. Joon had an arm around Jungkook, trying to turn him away from Yoongi without getting an elbow thrown back into his face. Hobi and Jin were darting after Yoongi, trying to stay between the two and keep space between them.

I squinted at the scene, trying to sort out how many of them there were until a pressure on the sides of my head made me aware of another presence. Gently tilting my chin upwards, the swimming sensation in my vision became still water for a moment after recognizing Tae's eye smile.

"Ok. All here." It was like talking with a mouthful of pudding.

"Seriously Lace, what the hell did he give her?" Jimin hissed above my nodding head.

"I swear to god I don't know. I told Jungkook already, I just saw her take a little blue pill and thought I should tell some...one..." Her words trailed off as I felt Jimin straightening his back beside me.

"You need to cut the shit, did you tell him Yoongi gave it to her? Did you see who gave it to her? Were you the one who did?" Jimin was seething.

"I told Jungkook-" Lacey began to repeat. And that was all I heard because that was what she was telling Jungkook. That thing I had been so mad about seeing. A loopy and effortful laugh shook my body in a way that made me nauseous.

The air between Jimin and Lacey neutralized before they both shifted a bit closer to press more support against my legs.

"Jungkookie - you're really needed over here." Jimin sounded worriedly impatient. I almost wondered if he actually said it, it felt so far away. Barely audible. There was no way Jungkook could have heard it.

But the sound of panting dropped into my ear and down my stomach in an instant. Jungkook had heard Jimin and was crouched in front of me, gently resting both elbows on top of my thighs while he helped hold my head up.

"From a friend," Words slurred out of my mouth as I dragged an iron tongue, "Yoongi shared." Keeping my eyes open was almost surely going to make me hurl - something I was fighting against with the few bits of consciousness I was maintaining.

Lips pressed in a straight line and a dutiful nod from Jungkook were worth the sick feeling that came from trying to glance at him.

After that, bigger chunks of time were lost.

I remember being set down in JK's bed and the feeling of my cheek pressing into the top of his thigh. My head resting in his lap like that slowed the spinning. Everything sounded like it was underwater.

Or maybe I felt like I was underwater.

A burning crept into my shoulder and made it impossible to ignore the fact that Jungkook had left at some point. My overly relaxed muscles sunken into a contorted position. I don't know why but the sharp pain of moving tightened my throat and choked me up. The desire to cry heaved in my chest, cut off by a whirlpool of confusion.

Absolutely nothing made sense. I didn't know how I had gotten there, even though it was a safe place. Had I really gotten drugged on game night? By that - wait, who was that?

The pieces of the evening I could remember replayed themselves and I strained to listen for any indication that a fight was going on outside.

I was met with silence. Waiting in the dark. No light from the hallway made it hard to tell if anyone else was in the house at all. JK's room felt like it doubled in size. My focus became as alert as it could get - anxiously anticipating the first sign of footsteps. I don't know how long I waited, but I remember the recognition of Jungkook's gait being followed by a more muffled one.

"Baby, it's Yoongi," a whisper fell over the room that felt louder than the creaking of the door. I lay motionless under a few layers of blankets, watching as the sudden light from the hall brought the walls back to where they should be. "I'll be right outside. As soon as he leaves I'll be here, don't worry." I never had to worry long with Jungkook.

A weight pressed onto the mattress next to me and my first night at their old house played along with real time. Eerie deja vu.

Yoongi's voice cracked when he spoke, "I'm so sorry. I didn't- It doesn't matter, I'm just so sorry." The mattress moved beneath us with a tiny tremble. Or maybe that was Yoongi. A plopping of tears onto bedsheets rang out into the quiet air.

Unable to get words out, I reached a hand back until it bumped against his. The top was slightly damp from his crying, and I attempted to wipe at it with a thumb before tugging it towards me. I could feel the limb drop, spent from the exertion it took to do what little I did.

A thinner arm, but just as warm and strong as Jungkook's found its way around me. Long fingers curled around the side of my ribcage and a wide palm pressed against my stomach.

A little sharp, Yoongi's chin tucked into the back of my shoulder. A repeated string of "I'm sorry"'s were murmured out, spreading warmth across my back in a mild wildfire. I couldn't figure out what he was saying sorry for. Placing my hand over the one on my stomach to try and get the message to him.

I lost what happened after that.

The next thing I can recall, was Jungkook laying on his back underneath me. Holding me to his chest in a full body headlock.

"Mm?" Jungkook managed to croak out the questioning sound mere seconds after my eyes opened. Pressing the back of his hand against my cheeks and forehead before resting two fingers on my neck to monitor my pulse.

I still felt trapped in submerged slow motion.

A plastic water bottle crinkled in his grip while he lifted it over his body. Unscrewing the cap with his other hand and placing the rim of it beneath my bottom lip.

He was even a natural at doing things like this? Or - had he needed to get good at this with someone else? The water tasted sour as it was tilted into my unbelievably dry mouth. It took a couple swallows to get rid of and I tried to use the time to think of a way to get the lid back from Jungkook. But by the time I had finished drinking, his head had knocked onto my shoulder and pinned me further down. The tickle from his light snore making me wriggle like a worm on a hook to get the lid back on the water bottle by myself. Even unconscious - his hold around me remained tightly fastened until the "oh shit" I uttered after spilling some of the bottle made him double down.

"JK!" Was gasped out and I remember that the rawness of it sounded like it couldn't have come from me.

The water bottle was tossed onto the floor behind us, rolling to a spot we wouldn't think about until nearly two days later.

"Baby, baby, baby," Jungkook dragged his nose across my face, following its path with sporadic kisses, "It's okay, it's okay, lemme love you.". And suddenly, I couldn't hear anything else but that. Lips ghosted across mine before pushing together into a kiss. Sleepy, slow and too purposeful to believe it was done unconsciously. "It's okay, lemme love you." singing me back to black in a lullaby.

I slept for the entire next day and most of the day after. Yoongi and Jungkook started to interact with each other a bit more while I was recovering. Jungkook treated me like I was made of the most fragile glass and Yoongi helped him, a little apprehensively. They had planned for Jungkook to call Yoongi's work and get the guy fired. Or maybe to beat him up. It all stopped feeling real. I know they didn't go through with the plan though, whatever it had been.

Yoongi returned from his next shift with news that the guy had bailed. Didn't show up, phone out of service, ignoring anyone that showed up at his door (or maybe he had moved away completely). Either way, nobody knew. Nobody saw him leave the party. I couldn't even remember what he had looked like.

Justice isn't always swift.

Despite speaking more, the trust Jungkook had in Yoongi - and in him being around me - had shrunk considerably.

Looking back at it now - helping that trust rebuild should've been a bigger priority.

Instead, we came up with an unofficial 6th rule - Only housemates (or people trusted by housemates) were to be allowed at game night.

And for three of us - a 7th rule became a vow. One so unspoken that none of us could put it properly into words.

But that's the thing about promises that can't be made out loud. Silent signings of emotional contracts.

If you've no way to explain it, how can you describe what's been broken?